Identity Crisis

Though young people search for their identity, far more older people go through an identity crisis.  As Christians, our lives are hid in Christ, in God (Col 3:3).  It becomes an adventure as we discover what He has put inside of us, and the life we are called to live.  Yet there is old baggage that we try to take along the journey with us.  It is called “self-image.”

Sometimes people’s image of what they would like to be is dearer to their hearts than who they are in Christ.  Although finding our new image is exciting, over time we find a way to fine-tune that Christ-like image so that it embodies who we want to be, and how we want to live our lives.

I have a friend who holds dear the image of kindness.  She puts herself in the roll of helping most of the time.  Though a teacher and a leader in the past with many giftings from the Lord, now that she is in her 60's she avoids roles of mentoring, teaching, or leadership. The result of her fine-tuning was two-fold: everyone thought she was wonderful . . . they loved her . . . but her spiritual identity became traumatized by her life-style.  She not only set no boundaries on her helping, but she had made no time for her gifting to be ministered to others.  With all the wisdom and discernment of over 40 years as a Christian stored in her, she had chosen a field of children to be kind to.  The children weren’t the ones who badly needed her wisdom and discernment.  Her other areas of help were with her family, who only wanted her “nice” self.

Though having people think we are wonderful and nice could be seen as a beautiful sunset to a busy life, eventually it causes identity crisis.  Ministering to the needs of our fellow Christian does not always please them.  Jeremiah wrote that “the Word of the Lord has brought me insult and reproach all day long.”  However, “if I say ‘I will not mention Him or speak any more in His name’, His Word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones.  I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot.” (Jer 20:8-9)

Perhaps we cause more damage trying to fine-tune our self-image into what is dearest to us than if we let the hidden nature of our Christ-identity be fully born on this earth.  When we hold back our God-given identity to please others or ourselves, there is the fire of God raging inside, wanting to be expressed in our lives.  My friend had a break-down and dealt with bitterness, even having a second near-break-down before she heeded God’s call to return to who she was in Him.  The praises of those who loved her for her kind works are not the sole motivation for her life, and the counsel of God is shared with her family and others.  She not only reaches out to those wiser than herself for their ministry, but in turn, she ministers to others.  And this has brought peace to the area of crisis in her heart.

Shouldn’t we be kind?  Of course we should.  But whenever we fine-tune our lives in such a way as to eliminate other aspects of our nature, and of Christ’s nature, we will suffer an identity crisis.  This is a time of healing, of returning to that which Christ has put within each man, woman and child.  Let us lay down our self-images and be excited once more with all we are in Him.  Then we will have peace and be effective ministers of the Lord.  Amen.